I've been complaining about or responding to that around here for 20 years or so—ever since my 2002 G5. It's been storage over USB and FW, however, never, ever Thunderbolt or Ethernet (for Time Machine) or SCSI on my Mac Plus–G4. The responses were often along the lines of "I've never seen that…". There was another recent thread complaining about this exact issue.External drives unexpectedly dismounting is a problem I've had with every Mac I've ever owned.
USB4 may have the same speed rating as TB3 but as you have seen, it has that old USB external storage issue. A TB enclosure has been certified by Intel. You never used to see that mentioned because it was never an issue. Apparently, USB4 has made Intel certification important. Again: "Thunderbolt compatible" is not Thunderbolt.
I have TB2 (through the TB2-TB3 adapter) and TB3 storage attached to my iMac Pro. Thunderbolt has been absolutely rock solid.
That WD Black you bought and the Crucial P2 are rated 2240Gbps—expect around 2000 in a 4 lane TB3 enclosure. The 970 EVO and similar drives are rated 3600 but they also run a lot warmer—expect 2600-3200 in a 4 lane TB3 enclosure. If putting it into a 2 Lane enclosure certified to be TB3, do not waste your money on a 970 EVO since those SSDs are already faster.
My TB2 dock has a pair of 8TB SATA III SSDs in it. Speed is rated 560Gbps and real world is probably around 480. That's fast enough for samples and archiving but if I try to bounce a DP file that I've archived on it, I sometimes get the hesitation that people used to complain about—I've always chalked that up to timing differences between internal storage and external that's about 1/13 the RW speed—bounce always completes, though. If I'm simply creating a new mix, I don't mind since moving the project back onto my System drive takes takes longer.
The reason I keep Kontakt and SampleTank on my System drive is that load (NI) and rebuilding the index (IK) can take much longer but once done, VI streaming feels the same.
One more thing: Move your AppleMusic (used to be iTunes) library to the external. When done, hold the Option key the first time you launch Music.app and navigate to that new location. Easy. Since Mojave, no simlink or alias.